11/20 Close Reading

Study proves that bigots, morons, not entitled to their opinions after all

This piece may seem like a silly humor column designed for a few shallow laughs, but if one looks closely and applies DIDLS, one will find that there's actually a lot going on here. The diction is what gets a lot of the humor through, particularly when it's played with. The article has a reasonably scientific tone, with words like "triggered," "turnaround," and "breakthrough" to describe the supposed discovery, but whenever the creators of the idiotic content are mentioned they are described as "fuckwits" and "idiots", starkly contrasting the more formal diction to create humor. They also, though, symbolize the unsophistication and primitiveness of the uninformed internet posters on contrast to the modern and enlightened world we live in.
The author also compares the imbecilic  population to a group of monkeys flinging feces, creating a ridiculous, deprecating image. He then uses this image to further denigrate them by going so far as to suggest that this primal picture is more mature and sophisticated than the content that some people share on the internet. This idea of contrast is then turned upside-down when he then compares the bloggers and commenters to Socrates, calling in details of his philosophy make a joke about how uninformed they are.
While one can read it and laugh, if one uses DIDLS one can really see that the author is using literary techniques to make put down those who post unthoughtful, inane, and inaccurate material on the internet and make readers consider whether they fall into this group from time to time. I'm sure it was entirely his intention to do so, and his goals will have been accomplished if a few hasty posters think twice before sharing their thoughts with the world.